The Seventh Fruit: Trust (MNM 11)
Greetings, friends, and welcome back to our study. I hope you survived the (many!) snow days, and that you're enjoying the hope of warmer temps and sunshine (yay!!!!).
And if you haven't already realized it, we are coming very close to completing our study on the fruits of the Spirit. After this week's readings, we have only one fruit left. Can you believe it?! You've been so diligent! And I hope you are ready to dive in to this week's materials. If so . . . . let's get started.
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| Thanks again to Suzanne Stelling for this amazing image. |
“Your eyes are windows into your body.
If you
open your eyes wide in wonder and belief,
your
body fills up with light.
If you
live squinty-eyed in greed and distrust,
your
body is a dank cellar.
If you
pull the blinds on your windows,
what a
dark life you will have!”
Matthew
6:22-23, The Message
Soaking in the Scripture
(Section 1)
Today, spend some
time reflecting on Matthew 6:22-23. Read
it a few times, perhaps in different translations, or even aloud.
Is there a word
or phrase that strikes you as particularly relevant to your life during this
season?
Give yourself
some time to think, journal, or talk with a friend about the thoughts that
emerge from your time of reflection.
Also, try and
find time to share this verse with each of your family members in ways that are
meaningful to each of them, and see what kinds of conversations happen.
Digging Deeper (Section 2)
Begin by
re-reading Matthew 6:22-23, and recall the ideas that came to mind when you
spent time with it previously.
You’ve probably
heard the saying “the eyes are the window to the soul.” This, of course, means a friend’s face—often
emphasized by the look in her eyes—can be an indication of her well-being. Just as it’s difficult to disguise a
sorrowful heart with a happy-looking face, it’s also hard to hide a joyful
spirit, even if our friend isn’t grinning from ear to ear. Most of the time, it only takes a glance at a
loved one’s eyes to get a sense of how she is doing on the inside. So our internal state can be reflected by
something external—in this case, our eyes.
But Christ’s
words here say something a little different:
He is saying that our internal state is impacted by how we choose to
look at life. In other words, the way we
look at things, both with our eyes and with our heart, can impact the
well-being of our very souls.
If you happened
to have studied a different translation of this passage, you may have found the
language a little vague. For instance,
the Amplified Bible translates Christ’s words in this way: “If your eye is sound, your entire body will
be full of light. But if your eye is
unsound, your whole body will be full of darkness.” The
NIV’s translation reads like this: “If
your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole
body will be full of darkness.”
Obviously, Christ
isn’t talking about eyes on a literal level—he’s not describing vision that is sound
or healthy; otherwise, this passage wouldn’t have much relevance for those with
good vision (although each day brings me disturbingly closer to a need for the
ever-dreaded reading glasses! J). Here, Jesus uses metaphor, comparing a
person’s eyes to something else. And
this, of course, raises a question: to
what is He comparing our eyes?
Fortunately, the
footnotes in the NIV shed some helpful insight: “The Greek for healthy here implies generous. The Greek for unhealthy here implies stingy.”
Thanks,
biblegateway!
In other words,
Christ is comparing our eyes to something internal—our attitude, or our
perspective. When our attitude is one of
generosity, our entire being is filled with light. But when our perspective errs on the stingy
side, it results in a sense of darkness.
Eugene Peterson’s
translation in The Message, which
serves as the opening scripture for this week, captures these ideas
powerfully.
As you consider
these ideas, see if you can recall a time when you approached a person or
situation from the perspective of greed (what can I get?) or mistrust (what bad thing is going to happen?). Do you think your attitude might have had an
impact on the actual experience?
Imagine what might have resulted if you’d been able to cultivate a
perspective of generosity (what can I give?)
or trust (what good thing is going to
happen?). The person or situation might
not have changed; however, might have your experience been different?
On the other
hand, try to remember an example of when you approached a person or situation
with a more generous and/or trusting outlook.
How did your attitude impact your soul’s well-being as you interacted
with this person or walked through the experience?
Keep in mind these
personal examples as you continue through this week’s material.
One Family’s Story (Section
3)
Caleb is a
strapping 14-year-old with blonde hair, blue eyes, and an All-American
smile. You may have met him before. He and his family, the Kuhns, live right here
in Knoxville, and he is an 8th grader at Concord Christian
Academy. Caleb hit his growth spurt a
little earlier than many of his friends, which has made him quite a leader on
his school’s fledgling football team. So
when he broke his foot during gym one January day, it wasn’t great news, but he
didn’t let it slow him down. His doctor
put him in a walking cast, which soon became more of a running cast, especially
when the neighborhood kids were playing an impromptu game of yard-ball. One afternoon, though, his doctor—who also
happens to be his neighbor—caught sight of Caleb and his buddies running passes
back and forth across the street.
“Caleb,” the
doctor said, “if you want to be ready for spring workouts in a few weeks,
you’ve got to stay off that foot. So,
how about you don’t let me see you out here again until it’s all healed up,
okay?”
“Yes sir,” Caleb
replied. He was embarrassed, but not
worried. His foot wasn’t hurting, and he
only had a few days until it was time for the walking cast to come off. When he went in for his follow-up appointment,
though, he received an unpleasant surprise:
because of all that extra activity, Caleb’s foot didn’t heal
properly. Now, he had 6 more weeks, and
this time, it would involve crutches and a real cast—the kind on which he
couldn’t put any weight.
After Caleb
hobbled to the car on his newly acquired crutches, he and his mom, Wendy, made
the drive home and talked about the situation.
He was definitely
upset about additional time in a cast, but he was even more unhappy about how
this would limit his spring training for football. In a couple of weeks, his teammates would start
practicing, but Caleb realized tearfully that he wouldn’t be able to
participate. The doctor had made that
very clear.
“Caleb, I know
you’re disappointed about how this has turned out, and I’m sure you aren’t
necessarily looking forward to the next six weeks. But you have a choice about how you think
about the situation.”
“You can focus on
how uncomfortable those crutches are, on how you can’t run around outside with
your friends, and on how much you wish you could start football practice with
your teammates.”
“Or you can focus
on the good things that come out of
this situation. You can enjoy the
unexpected chance to relax a little bit.
You can get stronger on your crutches.
And you can go to your football practices and participate by encouraging
them.”
Wendy paused and
looked over at Caleb, who was gazing out the window quietly.
“You definitely
have some things to complain about over the next six weeks, Buddy. If you choose
to do that, you’re probably going to make yourself, and everyone around you,
miserable. But if you decide to look for
the good things, the next six weeks are going to be completely different for
you, and for others. Ultimately, you
have a choice about how you look at this situation.”
Before
I share the next part of this story, I must say this: I’d be lying if I led you to believe that
good parenting always results in our children’s good choices. The truth is that even the most wonderful children
don’t always heed wise advice. (Click here for reminders about the importance
of continuing to do the “good hard” thing.)
http://shadowwonder.blogspot.com/2015/02/the-sixth-fruit-goodness-mnm-10.html
However,
in this instance, Caleb took his mom’s words to heart.
A
few weeks later, Caleb was asked to speak at his school’s chapel. Unbeknownst to his mom, he based his
presentation on Philippians 4:4, “Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice.” This seventh grade young man challenged his
classmates with these words: “Before I
broke my foot, I took walking and running for granted but this verse showed me
that I should be thankful for everything. . . . What are you thankful for? Don’t take this lightly. Actually think and consider it . . . Make
sure to thank God for everything in your life.”
One
reason Caleb can be thankful even during difficult experiences is because Wendy
has coached him to be expectant, and to watch for the blessings in the midst of
unpleasantness. He can do this because
she is helping him learn and practice trusting in God’s provision on a day-to-day
basis. He is learning to open his eyes
wide in wonder and belief.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One
of the things I admire and appreciate about my friend Wendy is her ability to
remain positive in just about any difficulty.
Part of that comes from her temperament, but part of it is a matter of
choice. Remember our study of James 1:17during the readings on joy? Despite what comes into my friend’s life, she is committed to keeping an eye
out for the good and perfect gifts. And
my instinct is that her ability to keep this perspective has to do with two
things: her generosity towards others—wanting to be sure that her words and
actions give good things to those around her; and her tenacious trust in God’s goodness both right now and in the future—regardless
of whether circumstances seem desirable.
But—true
confessions here—although I have tremendous admiration (and maybe even a little
envy! J) for the strengths that my friend and her son possess, their
natural bent towards being positive takes more effort on my part. Here’s what I mean.
If
I were Caleb in this story, I’m pretty sure I would’ve had a hard time feeling
anything other than upset—mad at myself for playing on an injured foot; angry
at having to continue time in a cast; sad and worried about whether my standing
on the team would change as a result of my decisions.
And
if I’d been Wendy in this story? Well, I
probably would’ve been in serious “blame” mode: mad at myself for letting my
son play so hard on a broken foot; mad at Caleb for doing it in the first
place.
Perhaps
most importantly: Regardless of whether
I’d been in Caleb’s or Wendy’s shoes, I also would have been inclined stay
“stuck” in the current experience. My
strongest instinct would be to focus all my energy on pointing out the
frustration and negative consequences this situation was creating. This means I would not have been inclined to look towards the future and the good
things that could come as a part of this unwanted (and completely avoidable)
situation.
What
about you? If you’d been Caleb in this
story, how might you have responded to the doctor’s news of more time in a
cast? To the decision you made to play
on an injured foot? What might have been
your thoughts and feelings in this kind of circumstance?
If
you’d been in Wendy’s shoes, how do you think you would have responded? What thoughts and feelings would have been
part of your experience?
Maybe
you are facing a hardship in your own life.
If you’re a mama with even one child at home, I’m guessing each day
brings its own less-than-desirable moments. That was certainly true for me! Close your time today by honestly and
prayerfully examining your perspective. Invite
God to help you as you consider these questions.
· * Are
there places where you tend towards mistrust or (I know it’s an ugly word)
greed?
· * Do
you tend to give your energy and attention to staying focused on frustrating
circumstances in the here-and-now, rather than looking ahead?
· * In
what ways are you approaching unwanted or difficult circumstances with trust
and generosity?
· * Where
are you able to find wonder in your circumstances? In what areas are you trusting God?
Your Family’s Story (Section
4)
Today,
spend a few minutes remembering the things you’ve read and thought of so far
this week.
As
God’s beloved and uniquely created daughter, and because He is living in and through
you, it’s likely that you are already living out a perspective of trust in your
life. Ask God to help you identify
places in your life where this is occurring, and celebrate His work in your
life. Here are some questions that might
help:
*
What are some simple ways you’re
finding to cultivate wonder and trust in your own heart, especially during your
season of mothering young children?
* What
are some everyday ways you’ve encouraged your children’s wonder about and trust
in God’s provision during all circumstances?
Also,
ask God to help you think of a few ways you might continue to cultivate this
trait in your own heart as well as your other family members’. As you jot down ideas, pray for the
discernment to recognize those that are good fits for your family members’
unique, God-created personalities. Then,
as time allows, talk about your ideas with them, and continue to pray for
wisdom.
Wisdom for the Journey
(Section 5)
The spiritual
fruit we’re focusing on this week is faithfulness. The original Greek for this word is pistis (πίστις), and this word is
often translated as “trust.” Vine’s Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words provides a
lengthy definition of this word, which I’d summarize in this way: A strong and welcome trust in Christ as the
source for our eternal salvation and the conviction that God exists and is the
creator and ruler over all things—including every circumstance which occurs in
our lives.
In other words, pistis has to do with a ruthless, tenacious
trust in God’s ever-abiding presence in our lives, regardless of what our days
look like. To me, trust pistis looks a
little bit like surrender—accepting the circumstances in our lives as
God-given, trusting Him to provide all that we need to navigate those circumstances,
and looking with hope for how He will do that.
Perhaps
my understanding of pistis/trust is why I see this spiritual fruit as an
integral part of non-cognitive traits like spirituality, humility, gratitude,
hope, and optimism.
* When
we are encouraging our children to trust in God’s provision (and practicing
that discipline ourselves), that looks like spirituality (the Christian
variation).
* When
that pistis/trust allows us to accept our God-given circumstances rather than
struggle against them, that might look like humility.
* When
our pistis/trust prompts us to find the things for which we can give thanks,
that looks like gratitude.
* When
our pistis/trust equips us to look expectantly to the future (rather than
staying “stuck” in the present), this looks like hope and optimism.
In
our family—especially when things get tough—we tend to focus on the present
moment, talking about who or what might be to “blame” for the circumstances,
and how we can “solve” the unpleasantness we’re experiencing. Early on in my parenting, I began referring
to this kind of thought process as “stinkin’ thinkin’”—focusing only on the
negative, rather than anticipating the good things God might bring. I can’t even begin to tell you the number of
conversations I’ve had with my children about the importance of avoiding
“stinkin’ thinkin.’” (In fact, we’ve had
so many talks about it that I’ve developed some “stinkin’ thinkin’” about
whether or not we’d every remedy this habit of mind. J)
Recently, though, one of my children acknowledged that he was engaging
in “stinkin’ thinkin’” about an issue we were processing. Even though it was a decade in coming, my
son’s realization was powerful for him . . . and for me. {Here's a quirky little song that picks up on these ideas, recorded by none other than Willie Nelson.}
Researcher
Carol Dweck, an educational researcher, uses a different term for “stinkin’
thinkin’” when she describes a “fixed mindset,” which occurs when an individual believes s/he
is not capable of improving his/her intellectual ability. A “growth mindset,” on the other hand, occurs
when an individual begins to believe s/he can
improve his/her academic capacity.
In her book, Mindset as well as this TEDTalk, Dweck
shows how vital it is for teachers to cultivate this “growth mindset” in their
students. My sense is that this is an
important emphasis for parents too. If
you’re interested in learning more, here are links to an article about Dweck’s work:
You
may also be interested in One Thousand
Gifts, in which Ann Voskamp graciously and honestly invites readers into a
daily practice of living expectantly and gratefully.
One
other thought: In recent weeks, Jeremiah
17:5-8 (see below) has been a meaningful reminder to me about the importance of
continuing to cultivate a tenacious trust in God. I’ll close with a prayer I’ve written that’s
built on the truths of that passage.
Lord,
your word reminds me that when my heart gets its strength from the things of
this world, I become like a bush struggling to stay alive in a land with
nothing to offer.
I
don’t want to dwell in the desert.
It’s
a lonely place, a hopeless place.
Oh
how I long for eyes that are able to see prosperity
when it comes.
I need this. My family needs this.
So,
Lord, I will put my confidence in You,
and I will encourage my loved ones to do
the same.
Together, we will trust in Your provision—
what You choose to
give,
and
when You choose to give it.
Help
us to sink the roots of our hearts into the nourishing, well-watered soil of
Your waters, so that when the dry, hot seasons come (and I know they will), we
won’t be inclined to fear . . .
.
. . but instead will be able to look ahead with hope,
knowing
You will sustain us,
trusting that You'll allow us to blossom at the right time.
Maybe
you (and possibly your family) would like to end this week’s readings by
reflecting on that scripture (or Matthew 6:22-23) and writing a prayer of your
own.
This is what the Lord says:
“Cursed is the one who trusts in man,
who draws strength from mere flesh
and whose heart turns away from the Lord.
That person will be like a bush in the wastelands;
they will not see prosperity when it comes.
They will dwell in the parched places of the desert,
in a salt land where no one lives.
“But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
whose confidence is in him.
They will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes."
Jeremiah 17:5-8
New International Version
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Jeremiah 17:5-8
New International Version
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We have come so far together in this study! I'm so glad you are continuing along. If you are ready for the post about gentleness (the eighth fruit), click here.
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